But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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