Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
