he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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