I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
