yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
