at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Dear god my vagina.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
