did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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