So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize