hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
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