Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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