one two three fourrrrnication!
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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