Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
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Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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