drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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