i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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