you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
