I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize
