new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
