Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
