He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize