So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
We don't watch enough power rangers
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize