Your tits are I can't wait for
I have demons in me.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
found the other keg... it's in the tree
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Randomize
