so that wasnt chicken after all
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
Shame is for Republicans.
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