areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
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