ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Hippo gnu deer
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
