she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize