How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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