But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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