I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
