the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
