You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
be right there i have to get my cape
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I enjoy the company of your penis
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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