I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
