i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize