I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize
