I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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