Why are handjobs necessary in class?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
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We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
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Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.