So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Randomize
