just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize
