That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Randomize
