Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
