I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
