Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are never too drunk for berry picking
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize