What tipped you off? The sombrero?
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize