yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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