i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
