he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
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dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
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You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
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