Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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