i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
