jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
