shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
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