So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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