I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
